I Have Lost My Eye More Times Than A 28-Year-Old Man Ought To Have Lost His Eye

My friend Sarah has taken up special effects make-up and prosthetics recently, so I spent the day having her remove my eye. Why, you ask? Well, it's because I look fucking great with one eye. I don't know why this is. It's just a thing we all have to live with.

Ladies.

Ladies.

Right? I found this out at Sarah's time traveller-themed birthday a few years ago, when I wore an eyepatch. The photos have since been lost to the Great Hard Drive Crash of 2012, but luckily for you I will wear an eyepatch at any given opportunity. Here I am drinking in my bedroom, where the light was good:

Here I am on my way to a Hallowe'en party dressed as Grunkle Stan from Gravity Falls:

You're welcome, internet.

Sarah also turned Norma into a burn victim. Norma also looks good. It takes less for Norma to look good, though, so she isn't the focus of this blog post. Nevertheless: